(She raises her skirt and does a mincing step around the room. Required fields are marked *. And the pretension! Theyd be miserable. Made me compare with Hermias sphery eyne? I mean, it wasnt like a disease or like some people have, thyroid or that type of deal she just shovelled shit into her mouth all the time, had a few kids, and, bang, shes up there at 350, maybe more. That can entame my spirits to your worship. Im crazy. Do you think I went home crying to my mommy, Oh, I dont have any friends. I did not. I mean, I know its not nice to have a bit of your stomach lining poking out, I get it, I do, but really how much more is there to say? WHO CARES WHAT PSYCHIATRISTS WRITE ON WALLS? When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. Amanda Wingfield: Prom is the quintessential teenage experience. Still, where would we be now if we had children? Father I wanted to be. So Adam has to beg me to go out with him. So I stood there in the shop, and there were loads of congratulations cards new babies, pink and blue, storks with bundles, balloons, all spewing out. Isnt that silly. I am exactly the type of man your parents want you to marry. I had to do this as Minnie Fay in my school's production last year. How to pick a comedy monologue: Which means he did. She was such a dick. And why, I pray you? Why, what means this? And you will help me. One of my favorites is from ""Hello Dolly!" And thats not me. Excuse Me Of course WA AHHH Minnie hold your tongue There's a man in there ! Gonna be insane. Its like hes confused about how attractive I am he cant quite believe it. Rudolph Reisenweber: No expression. Terrify me. Im sorry to do this to you, but I was afraid Id never get the chance to tell you. Pat. Where Hello, Dolly! --Rochelle O'Gorman Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Production: 20th Century Fox Won 3 Oscars. What? Maybe Ill never walk down the aisle with a smug look of bridal triumph. You have come to the right page. Even so, it was, you know, embarrassin and the mad thing is the room was upstairs with the curtains open and didnt the 19A fly past and the whole top deck nearly broke their necks for a gander. Sides: Dolly Monologue, Act I Dolly & Vandergelder, Act I Dolly & Vandergelder, Act II, sc. Study Guide-- Thetare Under The Stars And figure the reason they cant get the stuff, is because the Americans are stopping them. Now I know this sounds like Im throwing away everything Ive said so far. Do you think I let that stop me? "We've created a new Dolly Levi, a very young widow," Kelly explained. Here we fucking go, this better be good. Like I never bothered countin them. Dolly Levi: Goodness, the whole room is crawling with men. Horace: Eighty percent of the people in the world are fools and the rest of us are in danger of contamination. 1969 Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Rating: G Runtime: 146 minutes They just don't make musicals like this any more. And out of you she sees herself more proper Im a genius. You seem like a real sweet girl and I, just, I dont want you to get hurt. He called me by my name. And if its to do with letting the house then youll have to ring the house-agents, because theyre the agents for the house. Well, okay, um There were a few times that I couldve done that. Proud of what hes achieved. The composer. Oversized jacket. Know why, you pathetically ineffectual and pusillanimous pretend-friend-to-animals?! She slapped me. It doesnt matter. Our time together But I think that were very different people. I think. So you see, she knew I was going to lead the Army of the Twelve Monkeys into the pages of history before it ever even occurred to me. You know the problem with pyromania? You could lie there thinking well, at least Im not dead! Hello. Jealous. Or how they view my choices and, yes, maybe that makes me not very deep, or petty, or some other word, hell, I dont know! Can I be a dad or not? In a couple of minutes the whole bloody house was alight and within half an hour there was no bloody front door to knock on. Im marrying your father in two weeks whether you like it or not. Soon as you take the weight off your feet, down it all comes on your head., Helena: Act 2, Scene 2 Ill tell you why: because when I had anything to do with her six years ago, there was no such thing I hadnt even thought of it yet! And you know what Im gonna get her back. boarding school! Do you ever think of yourself as actually dead, lying in a box with a lid on it? Your email address will not be published. So many you should go change, and then we can be in love at another time. Not here, not out on the town having such a good time. So what Im thinking is Oh man, this is so brilliant, its scary. Youre sorry?! James: Minnie Fay's Monologue // Hello Dolly - YouTube 0:00 / 1:25 Minnie Fay's Monologue // Hello Dolly 3,917 views Jul 24, 2019 18 Dislike Share Haley Katherine 7 subscribers Haley Katherine. Boo was built a bit like a guinea pig. Even taking into account the fact that youre dead, really ask yourself, if I asked you straight off Im going to stuff you in this box now, would you rather be alive or dead? But if you want to think the whole meant nothing to me, then go ahead because thats not the case. Firecrackers, literally, not figuratively. If requested, here are a few audition monologues for Hello, Dolly! Maybe Ill never have someone get down on a knee and offer me a diamond ring. Look Some of the best minds in our country peeing all over the floor in this here facility. Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. If you say vampire I'll scream! Made Brewster pigs in a blanket tonight before leavin. Yes, but theres no one here, love. Christ almighty, try working for you for a living! It isn't overly long, like a Shakespeare monologue, but it is poignant and energetic. O.K.? Happier? Harrys a bit fat. Like, totally. You say youre sorry? That you insult, exult, and all at once, All right. Ill give you a clue: hes got a fucking hernia. Do, as a monster fly my presence thus. Honestly. Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Zelda: Just give me five minutes of your time, Mr. Hackl, and I'll have you dancing in the streets. I always just assumed I had two. But then this guy called Corey joined our school, and suddenly all that stopped. And you dont expect that when you break up with someone do you? I didnt tell her parents the truth. She seems to shed real tears in Dolly's monologues to her late husband Ephraim . Dotty: You would be amazed, a lot of shopping malls. - Definition, History & Artists, What Is Reggae? Create your account. Your email address will not be published. Fuck. Shes dead now. You know, not everything has to be so goddamn IMPORTANT all the time! Meredith: Im even gonna get a compact disc player. A return from Miss Mortimer again? Is he crazy? 355 lessons. So I decided to go to the doctor. Do you see where Im going with this? And, all right, I know the Americans go on with all this flag-waving, patriotic bullshit and think the rest of the world hates them, but fuck, Talbot, theyre right: the rest of the world does hate em I hate em, and I want to live here! I didnt come here for help. Its too late to go home and change. In the performance, there are 3 important monologues: Cornelius's 'wonderful things', Dolly's 'Ephram', and Hector's 'foolishness' monologues. Glittering stage numbers showcase a commanding Barbra Streisand as Dolly Levy, a New York matchmaker who can find a mate for anyone. Just this, like, one tear I see as were sitting at a stoplight on the way home. I thought, I dunno, I thought maybe they were so close together they felt like one, or maybe when one was down there, the other was off doing somethin else like I dunno, I just never thought about it. Cornelius Hackl: We have to, 'cause some rotten cans of chicken mash are going to explode. Minnie Fay: A banana a day keeps the doctor away. Transfer to Washington. But they wrote the most incredible, passionate letters every day, and they really made those two hours count. Ive been at the hospital, Kayleigh. Rosencrantz: With music written by Jerry Herman, and Michael Stewart writing the book, 'Hello, Dolly!' was first performed on Broadway in 1964. Philip: Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. Shakespeare in the Woods 2023 Season Who knew those would be the magic words? Maybe you feel for me the way you feel for a good friend, or if the world f hates me a brother. But I cant help it. I thought we had a really good time together and I was actually in a fairly Up state of mind for once. Hes wearing this perplexed expression and hes saying you want me to leap tall buildings and be sensitive and supportive?! Gorgeous, fresh-faced, heels, wearing a skirt, new top, little bit sexy, on my way to save my caf and yes, I am strutting. The point is Im messed up. - Definition, Origin & History, Woodstock: History, Facts, Performers & Bands, Jesus Christ Superstar: Summary & Characters, Electronic Music: History, Types & Artists, Art, Music, and Architecture Around the World, Introduction to Textiles & the Textile Industry, World Music & Art Lesson Plans & Activities, NES Music - WEST (504): Practice & Study Guide, Library Science 101: Information Literacy, Pope Gregory II: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory VII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory VIII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XIII: Accomplishments & Legacy, Pope Gregory XV: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XVI: Biography & Accomplishments, Bishop Oscar Romero: Biography, Assassination & Quotes, Blessed James Alberione: Biography, Death & Quotes, Pope John XXIII: Biography, Facts & Quotes, Pope John XXIII: Canonization, Contributions & Miracles, Archbishop Aloysius Stepinac: Biography & Quotes, Working Scholars Bringing Tuition-Free College to the Community. The other three are Stephanie Block, the baker's wife, Tony Award winner for "The Cher Show;" Gavin Creel, Cinderella's prince/wolf, Tony winner for "Hello, Dolly;" and Sebastian Arcellus, the . Hes passing, hes passing. You probably think Im some spoiled brat whos never had it hard cause I didnt have to walk a mile to school. Gonna really make an effort. But, mistress, know yourself: down on your knees, : Synopsis, Characters & Monologues, Jefferson Airplane: History, Members & Songs, Jerry Herman: Biography, Songs & Musicals, Julie Andrews: Biography, Movies, Books & Awards, Leonard Bernstein: Biography, Compositions & Musicals, My Fair Lady: Summary, Characters & Setting, New Orleans Jazz: History, Music & Musicians, Rhythm & Blues: Definition, History, Artists & Songs, Rodgers & Hammerstein: Biography & Musicals, Stephen Sondheim: Biography, Songs & Musicals, The Rolling Stones: Biography, Members & Songs, The Sound of Music: Summary, History & Characters, The Temptations: Biography, Albums & Songs, West Side Story: Summary, Songs, Characters & Composer, What Is Folk Music? Hes about to say something. Monologue from Hello, Dolly!-Cornelius Hackl - YouTube 0:00 / 1:58 Monologue from Hello, Dolly!-Cornelius Hackl Singing Rome 42 subscribers Subscribe 11 Share 1.1K views 7 years ago Show more. Ive been trying to rationalize them away, pressure from the wedding, the intimacy of working together, but I cant. Oh Hello! I know, right? And in conclusion, may I remind you that it doesnt say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Is that clear? Anyone but herself, that is. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Our 9x sold out online acting course returns soon. All monologues are property and copyright of their owners. 11 chapters | I know where all the nukes are and I know the codes. Straight down. Quotes." How to approach a comedy monologue: Fine. Gillian: And he cant take that off at night. She says, Surely you must have noticed? But that was the thing. This thing with Naomi-okay, it should never have happened-but it didnt have to impact on what I have with Meg. I tell her I loved Hope Floats. Because if you do, your parents will always know the unhappiness you feel for not being able to disappoint them. Like its such an intense experience but then nobody knows what to fuckin say, even though nothing really bad actually happened. - Definition, Artists & Instruments, What Is Rumba? Tis not her glass, but you, that flatters her; His name for me. But you know what? Blubbering, whining, crying Chuck. Or maybe get hit by a truck full of hot garbage juice, you know? Thats what I basically learned from our time together. Next we have the cast of characters that are the objects of Dolly's matchmaking: Cornelius Hackl, Barnaby Tucker, Irene Molloy, Minnie Fay, Ambrose Kemper, Ermengarde, and Ernestina Money. All lacy with dogwood, literally flooded with jonquils! Happy is Hermia, wheresoeer she lies; Stop! Thats the bit I dont like, frankly. Break a finger, maybe. (as if this is shocking) I was best friends with her in middle school. Cornelius Hackl: Because I'm gonna light some candles under them. Here is The Complete PDF Library The fact is, you hardly know me! Henry: Isnt that the most pathetic thing youve ever heard? Yeah. Yeah, check me out, cos its never gonna happen, Chub Chub. Shakespeare in the Woods 2023 Season Its weird to say this, because in many ways Im already in so deep. He would hate me for telling you but hed lost control of his bowels. Invitations poured in parties all over the Delta! The one dark secret that will absolutely be the wedge that keeps us apart. Like, one of my favourites is that the bus breaks down one day in this remote place and there we are stranded together. And I can be proud of who I am. Totally freaked out, she did. This Book have some digitalformats such us : kindle, epub, ebook, paperbook, and another formats. He tells her he cant help himself. Looking for a great comedic monologue? But I just-I just wish women would say what they mean. I hid in the shrubs when Mum came outside to see what was happening. Must you be therefore proud and pitiless? I had it on the day I met your father. Boom. The role Horace Vandergelder was a lot of fun to. Let me just begin by saying that there are two sides to every story. I told you Im brilliant. I thought of him searching through the fridge and not finding a morsel. Its like a teacher waved a magic wand and did the work for me. Evidence. Web. It doesnt help. Guys are blind, they really are, OBLIVIOUS to when a girl is not interested. I know all that. ), I wore it on Sundays for my gentlemen callers ! HELLO, DOLLY! Stop! Far more interesting than all those silly girls at school. Im just a kid at the time, but I can remember thinking that. I PUT MY HAND IN HERE. Im referring to myself when I say Megan, its me Megan. Coz all of those things would exponentially cooler than going to the dance with you. - Definition, History & Songs, What Is Swing Music? I cant open sardines and answer the phone. Just for a minute. Was I free? It was a joke, Amanda and her jonquils ! STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Irene Molloy: Minnie, I don't mind that you never finish your lunch, but I do mind that you never finish your sentences. I expect. Im totally psyched. I did never think to marry. Factors in. The New York Daily News wrote: 'I wouldn't say that Jerry Herman's score is memorable.' I don't know who he is, but I do know this: At a time when I was trying to hide myself from myself, he was there to show me a new way. Now you listen and listen good. Helen things are so tricky, life is. No, faith, proud mistress, hope not after it: No, Im not in Spain, dear. (moves to Fale, jabs him with a finger) You think I told her about the Army of the 12 Monkeys? So we get keys made for each others apartments. I had to stand up to her. I confess Im, in no small part, to blame for all the gossip that has turned my varsity letter scarlet. After I base my entire concept of self-esteem on the fact that youre willing to marry me! How do they get it up there? And Im buggin. Who should get into the lift with me on floor number seven? when guys come up to me, with their cheesy lines, (imitating guy) Hey, you have such a beautiful smile or Can I just tell you that you are so beautiful. Just thinking he might look at me, my heart starts pounding like mad. We don't currently have any monologues from Hello, Dolly!. I had my first beau at eleven. She rocked it. I would definitely recommend Study.com to my colleagues. I dont believe in them. But by the end of the day it was like the more, the merrier. Bedroom. The men are eyeing us for the wrong reasons. Cornelius Hackl: I've lost everything: my job, my future, everything people *think* is important, but I don't care - because even if I have to dig ditches for the rest of my life, I shall be a ditch-digger who once had a wonderful day. New York, NY, Accessibility Statement Terms Privacy |StageAgent 2020. Warren: You are a thousand times a properer man I went straight to Sues house and was literally about to tell her and thats the night she said she finally wanted to have sex. Hello, Dolly! Ambrose Kemper: This doesn't concern her! Not literally. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. How many times have I heard that? Popular I thought that was the deal. The more my prayer, the lesser is my grace. But I do. Your bugle eyeballs, nor your cheek of cream, Oh Mrs. Molloy, what shall we do? Anyway, I go off and a couple of weeks later I go back for the ultrasound. Youd only get depressed. Not that Id like to sleep in a box, mind you, not without any air youd wake up dead, for a start and then where would you be? or asleep? I hope youre not suggesting Im marrying your father for his money. I look after the house for him, but I go home at one oclock on Wednesday, only Ive got a nice plate of sardines to put my feet up with, because its the royal whats-its called on the telly the royal you know wheres the paper, then? It seems her affections have their full bent. Dolly Levi: Yonkers, New York, to handle a highly personal matter for Mr. Horace Vandergelder, the well-known, unmarried, half-a-millionaire. I know hed never go for a dag like me. I want to be better to do good and better things and to make a proper sort of decision here, but I I cant. That you will just stand still. Like I didnt know until that moment just how much I wanted to be a father. Im going to admit something I never thought Id admit to anyone ever. You hate the sound of children playing and you hate all of your living relatives and you hate people who wear sunglasses, even during the day, and you hate going to dinner which you know I love! Yes folks, its true. Well, all power to George W I dont want the fucking pricks to win, either. Hey, Lisa. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A WOMAN WHO ARRANGES THINGS. I got you into a Remington Party! Is he serious? Im not mad. Michael: Dolly Levi: It makes me feel good to have so many friends. And did he ask how I was? Don't worry about the lack of a solid story or Gene Kelly's pedestrian direction. Course, that means the chances of you getting caught are greater, especially if youre standing in front of the fire, face full of ecstasy and with a gigantic hard on. But thats not the worst bit, Stephen. He tells me that Ive got an unresolved problem with my mother. And Im like, Whats the problem? and he says The problem is, dude, youre fucking my girlfriend. So I look at Marissa and Im like Youre someones girlfriend? And she says No. Then it comes out Chuck just wishes shes his girlfriend but actually shes his cousin or something, so hes got these feelings of guilt about wanting herand then he starts crying. The story is adapted from the 1955 play 'The Matchmaker'. "Hello, Dolly! This monologue is from Thornton Wilder's "The Matchmaker". For the next three years, they were allowed to see each other only once a year for two hours. I hear how I am censured: they say I will bear myself proudly if I perceive the love come from her. My dad was always working late golfing on weekends, and I knew it was because of her. These monologues will work well for auditions, perhaps a showreel update or for just some self-taping fun. Its me. Book by Music and Lyrics by MICHAEL STEWART JERRY HERMAN Based on the play THE MATCHMAKER by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion-Five, Inc, DOLLY Property of: 4 Lyries~@ Copyright 1963 by Jerry Herman.

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